Managing Your Brain When Your World Seems Unmanageable
Our personal, family, and business lives can feel inundated by the coronavirus and its impact. Such a sudden change in our circumstances, and the uncertainty that follows, can seem overwhelming and unmanageable. There are some real reasons to experience some anxiety, dread, and helplessness. However, if we do not keep some sense of mastery and control, we will not be effective in our personal and work lives. CMA wants to offer some ideas and tactics that can help you during these stressful and challenging times. While we may not be able to manage all the changes and challenges coming at us, we can manage how we perceive and process what is going on around us. Simply put, we need to manage our brains.
Our thinking and cognitive abilities are definite strengths that can work against us if overused and undermanaged. Every time we think, we are, in a sense, talking to ourselves. So, let’s consider our thoughts to be “self-talk.” We can monitor and manage our self-talk, what we tell ourselves about situations as part of our inner dialogue, and this can change how we feel and how we act.
If I am required to work remotely and my self-talk is something like, “This is terrible. I won’t be able to stay connected with my colleagues and clients…this will turn out badly,” I will feel down, hopeless, and perhaps a bit paralyzed and not motivated to do my assigned work. In this same situation, if I tell myself, “I don’t like this but I will make the best of it. I can get through this. I will make a plan to stay connected and keep using my talents and skills,” I am more likely to be proactive, have a better level of motivation, and feel more empowered.
I may not be able to change my current situation, but I can change how I think about it. That is under my control. Negative thinking leads to low energy, poor focus and attention, and inaction. Positive and empowering self-talk leads to better emotional health, more motivation and energy, and active coping. This is not the same as naive optimism but, rather, it is deciding what message you are giving yourself about your circumstances. Are you giving yourself messages that help you cope and take action, or messages that keep you stuck, worried, and irritable?
Some practical ramifications and tactics for managing your brain follow from this perspective.
Monitor and challenge your thinking/self-talk. In tough situations, take a few moments to write down your actual thoughts and your “self-talk.” Look at these statements and decide if these are likely to help you cope and problem solve or if they are leading to anxiety and negative emotions. Keep, repeat, and practice self-talk that is helping you cope and take action. Simply repeating these specific thoughts, on a regular basis, can lead to better self-mastery and calmer emotions. Look at any negative or self-defeating thinking statements, consider how to modify these, and replace them – again on a regular basis – with empowering and motivating self-statements.
Differentiate between problem-solving thinking and worry. I am problem solving if my thinking is generating some options or solutions, leading to some action plans, or helping me cope. Problem-solving thinking is usually time-limited and focused. Worry, on the other hand, is repetitive and non-specific. It generates emotional distress but no productive actions, and can go on, and on, and on. Like those late-night awakenings when you cannot turn off your thoughts. It may sound odd, but you can manage worry by scheduling some “worry time.” If you need to worry, or are prone to do this, strive to manage it by keeping it time-limited, and schedule it so YOU are in control, NOT your worry. If you have random worries, you need to catch these, remind yourself that you will think about these during your scheduled worry time (you can jot these down, briefly, for later), and redirect your brain to a pleasant thought, engage in some activity or exercise, or focus on some neutral or interesting stimuli around you.
YOU are in control, NOT your worry.
Limit your brain input. We need to monitor and limit the amount of information, updates, or reminders that are coming at us from multiple media inputs and from those around us. Overthinking and cognitive overload are particularly prevalent right now. Find ways to limit this input, cut down on automatic notifications on your phone and/or email, and focus outward, not inward. It can help to keep up some regular habits or routines that get you out of your head. These can include exercise, household tasks, organizing your work space, or looking for ways to help others.
Remember, managing your brain is like any skill or habit. The more you practice brain management on a regular basis, the more skilled you can become in making sure your brain is working for you, and not against you. Be kind to others, and be kind to your brain.
