The Perfectionist’s Paradox: Finding Balance in the Quest for Excellence
Perfectionism is on the rise across the industrialized world, driven by cultural shifts and onerous organizational expectations (Curran & Hill, 2018). Some individuals strive for perfection in their work, while others are held to unrealistic standards by supervisors or clients. This pressure can take a toll on our mental and physical health, leading to anxiety, stress, and burnout. This blog aims to shed light on the concept of perfectionism, its impacts, and most importantly, how to effectively manage it.
Perfectionism is a distorted way of thinking that prevents us from seeing ourselves and the world clearly (Burns, 1983). It leads us to set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and others and can make it difficult to appreciate accomplishments. In the workplace, perfectionism can manifest in several ways. For example, perfectionists may:
- Procrastinate on tasks because they are afraid of making mistakes.
- Overwork themselves and take on too much responsibility.
- Be overly critical of their own work and the work of others.
- Be afraid to ask for help or delegate tasks.
- Have difficulty setting boundaries and saying no to requests.
- Be perfectionistic managers who micromanage their team members.
However, perfectionists can also be valuable assets to their teams. They are often highly productive and produce high-quality work, as perfectionists may:
- Hold high standards for themselves and their work.
- Be highly motivated to achieve their goals.
- Be highly conscientious and detail oriented.
- Desire to constantly improve their skills and knowledge.
- Take time to do things thoroughly.
- Be more persistent in overcoming obstacles.
In this way, perfectionism is a paradoxical mix of characteristics. To explain this paradox, researchers tend to separate the concept into two different components: perfectionistic concerns and perfectionistic strivings. On the one hand, perfectionistic concerns are driven by a chronic fear of failure, a consuming anxiety over mistakes, and a deep-seated distrust of one’s own abilities (Ocampo et al., 2020). They lead individuals to believe that their self-worth is determined by their ability to meet their own unrealistic standards (Burns, 1983). The aspects of perfectionistic concerns are primarily responsible for many of the negative consequences to perfectionism, including poor mental and physical health.
On the other hand, perfectionistic strivings are reflected in the relentless pursuit of excellence (Ocampo et al., 2020). Those with perfectionist strivings demonstrate a commitment to high personal standards, working diligently, setting ambitious goals, and constantly pursuing self-improvement. Although it’s easy to think of perfectionistic strivings as the “good” form of perfectionism, the reality is more complex. While striving for excellence can lead to high-quality work, increased productivity, and improved efficiency, it can also hinder progress, especially in times of uncertainty or ambiguity. Perfectionists can be so focused on producing their best effort that they may neglect to appropriately prioritize their time and energy (Hougaard & Carter, 2020). Specifically, the inability to prioritize effectively may stem from their reluctance to label any decision as unimportant, their compulsion to overdeliver, and their hesitance to start tasks they are unsure they can complete successfully (Boyes, 2020).
See the figure below for insight into the consequences of perfectionistic strivings and perfectionistic concerns. Note that the bullet points with colored text represent positive outcomes, while those with white text represent either mixed findings or negative outcomes.
Now that we understand the different facets of perfectionism, let’s explore effective strategies to manage and navigate this complex mindset:
- Setting realistic expectations. The first step towards finding balance and overcoming the negative effects of perfectionism is understanding that perfectionism is driven by unrealistic standards (Ocampo et al., 2020). By recognizing that perfection is an unattainable goal, individuals can adjust their expectations to more realistic levels. To do so, clearly define success and establish achievable milestones that break down large tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. Emphasizing progress over perfection allows room for growth, learning, and ultimately, achieving success.
- Celebrating progress and small victories. Perfectionists often overlook their achievements, fixating on failures or areas for improvement (Beheshtifar et al., 2011). By consciously celebrating progress and acknowledging small victories along the way, individuals can combat their tendency to pursue unattainable goals (Ocampo et al., 2022). Additionally, this practice cultivates a sense of pride and helps build self-esteem.
- Practicing mindfulness and self-reflection. Practicing mindfulness techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing, allows individuals to observe their thoughts and emotions without judgment. This awareness enables individuals to detach from their perfectionistic tendencies and gain a clearer perspective on their goals and priorities (Ocampo et al., 2022). For example, individuals may challenge their perfectionistic thoughts by asking if their standards are truly realistic and achievable. Regular self-reflection helps identify patterns of perfectionism and make mindful adjustments.
- Embracing mistakes as opportunities. Perfectionists tend to view mistakes as personal failures rather than valuable learning experiences (Beheshtifar et al., 2011). By reframing mistakes as opportunities for growth, individuals can shift their mindset and create a positive relationship with failure and acknowledge that mistakes are necessary steppingstones on the path to success.
- Promoting self-care. Cultivating self-compassion—which involves acknowledging our flaws, embracing our humanity, and treating ourselves with kindness—is essential for combatting self-criticism and other negative thoughts and feelings that stem from perfectionism (Saunders, 2022). Additionally, perfectionism is often intertwined with excessive work hours and neglecting personal well-being (Swider et al., 2018). Taking breaks and engaging in activities outside of work can help reduce anxiety and increase overall satisfaction with work.
- Seeking social support. Perfectionism often accompanies feelings of loneliness and isolation, as individuals strive to hide perceived flaws (Bregman, 2009). Seeking support from friends, family, or mentors can provide perspective, validation, and a source of motivation. Sharing concerns and experiences with others who can relate helps challenge the erroneous belief of “I must excel alone.” Additionally, individuals should push themselves to ask for help from others in the workplace, delegating tasks and collaborating, when needed.
- Embracing feedback. Learning to accept and embrace constructive feedback is another crucial aspect of overcoming perfectionism (Knight, 2019). Perfectionists often struggle with receiving criticism, as it can be perceived as a personal attack. However, feedback is essential for growth and improvement. Recognize that it is an opportunity to learn and grow, rather than a sign of failure.
While perfectionism can have its advantages, it is essential to find a balance and overcome its drawbacks in the workplace. The above strategies are all steps in the right direction. By doing so, individuals and organizations can harness the benefits of perfectionism while avoiding the detrimental effects on productivity, mental well-being, and team dynamics. Remember, progress and growth are far more important than the illusion of perfection.
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